Everyday struggles hold me up
Inside I'm weaping
New decisions, new missions
Badly dreaming
I can not stop
I'm bleeding out
See you in a vision
Is it real?
Is it really you, I need?
And who needs me?
Where is the safe place to hide?
Where is the one by my side?
Do we go together so well?
Are you still the same, the one I fell
For?
You see, the struggle is real.
Every moment I feel
And I feel every moment
And everything
I can't stop feeling
And thinking a thing.
I feel lost and alone while I should not
I feel happy and loved, but I can not
Forget
the darkness inside my head.
I try
And the harder I try
The darker I dye
My dreams and thoughts
And I cry
Tears on my blanket
Tears on my face
Tears everywhere.
No one cares.
Where is the woman I once was?
There's only the girl left inside.
Where is the fighter I worked hard to be?
The armour is gone and lost is the fight.
Left is the struggle
The pain
Left is to get up
Again and
Again
I wrote this poem in November 2017, but could not publish it, for it hurt to much. Now over a year later, I come to realize, that it was the last thing I wrote in here and that it fits under other circumstances still very well. This time its not the person by my side, that makes me feel this way, but a quarrel between myself and the world outside.
